He needed to put limits on himself. With each cigarette, he felt a heavy failure or weakness that nagged at him. It wasn't so much that he didn't like smokiong, but that he didn't seem to feel he had a choice anymore. Something was keeping him crawling everyday.
The countdown would begin; 100 cigarettes to the end.
When he smoked number 100...he would make an occassion out of it...it would have to be an after sex ciggy for closure. It would be over...he would be free.
Sunday, December 04, 2005
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